Thursday, April 29, 2010
i was a little bored at work so i gave myself knuckle 'tattoos'.
i'm gonna go live up to them right now. i've been skiving all week, boo.
i guess it's lucky half the good telly's not on tonight because of the some debate. i don't get to vote, so i rather not make my mind up, i'll just be upset i didn't get to make a difference. i get so annoyed when people say things like "oh i like clegg (the lib dems leader) but there's no point voting for them..." if everyone thinks like that, of course there isnt. i know i haven't been paying attention, but libdems do seem like the best option. labour haven't done a very good job lately (though everyone seems to be in a financial mess, so is that really necessarily the labour goverment's fault? cos you know, shit happens.) and.. well, remember what it was like last time the tories were in charge? (i know, i wasn't here, blah blah blah, but i've heard that shit went down, and it wasn't good.) carl got his poll whatever thing in the post the other day, i said to him "if you can't make your mind up, will you just vote on my behalf?" i think that's fair enough.
i'm so tired of the whole "it won't make any difference" excuse. so tired. if everyone with a bit of sense thinks that and doesn't bother, then dickheads who do bother get to make the difference.
also, getting really sick of the calling each other names tactics of political campaign. whatever happened to campaigning with actual policies instead "that one sucks more than me, vote for me!" crap. i'm sure the campaigns back home aren't this fucking petty.. it's really getting me down. especially since i've only seen posters for the tories so far in this town. i also got pissed at the "vote for english" advert on bbc last friday. fifteen minutes of some git basicly going england for the english. pretending not to be racist, but really being underneath it all. it was like bnp lite. really wanted to punch the telly. and carl. cos he was waving his passport in my face going "aren't you jealous of my pretty passport, it's got unicorns on it!" (nothing to do with the advert. he started it before it came on.) i may have got grumpy and screamed at the poor boy.
how did this end up an election rant?
"25 or 6 to 4" chicago
Monday, April 26, 2010
a few things in list form because i'm lazy and should go to bed:
+ i'm loving the new kate nash album, especially 'mansion song' and the hidden track at the end of 'i hate seagulls'. and everytime do wah do is played on the radio is kind of the highlight of my day. i just really like the riff in the beginning. it's simply delicious.
+ i feel better now that i've sort of sorted a bunch of distro orders and done a stock check. bunch of stuff's sold out though, and a bunch of orders are actually for stuff that's sold out. again.
+ i've been eating a lot of pasta salad (pasta, pesto, cherry tomatoes, two types of olives + parmesan) best evs lazy dinner / lunch. i think i'll be more or less eating that all week during my lunches. it's so nom.
+ order of the phoenix always gets me down because it's so extra woetastic. i'm being a bit extra everything at the moment, but i'm trying new strategies of coping. some inspired by not lonely #2 and some by my therapy homework.
+ i've started wearing my hair in bunches. except at work, can't be bothered with sarky comments about anything else. i should buy some ribbon to go accessorize with.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
i had a bit of a meh start of a saturday. as usual. though at least i managed to not sleep until noon today, as i have done in the past couple of weeks, despite going to bed before midnight both fridays.. it seems i should really not sit in my jammies, ever, it just gets me into bouts of apathy, just trouble. i managed to beg carl to come into town with me after unsuccessfully trying to sort out distro orders (i'm sorry anyone who has ordered anything in the past.. two weeks. i'm currently made of fail) so i got my arse in gear and had a wash and got dressed and suddenly felt much less useless. i even got out my sailor dress i haven't worn since last summer and put on some perfume. we went into town to get food and even absent mindedly wandered into a few shops, mainly cex (second hand dvd game etc shop) and tk maxx. didn't actually dare to go to any other shops as i bought a bunch of stuff in both shops. still only spent about a tenner though. £10.73 to be exact. oh and then there was dinner, quite a bit of it too, for a few days (though i'll have to get top ups, like vegetables etc at some point.) even got fancy puddings for 40p (usually at least £1.99, if not £4) cheese, taste the difference burgers & more mince. nomface. carl cooked burgers after doctor who (WHICH WAS FUCKING GENIUS OMG I CANNOT WAIT TIL NEXT SATURDAY WHERE THE FUCK IS MY TIME MACHINE?!) and they were food orgasm. seriously. so good. burgers are pretty much the main reason i'm not vegetarian. also the fact i'm not really into denying myself things if i like them. life's too short. especially with all the read meat i eat, ha.
i'm rather looking forward to using my new carry on plates with barbara windsor in her swimwear. i loves her, and they're saucy. oo-eer. maybe i'll make some cheeky lunch tomorrow while carl's at oxfam. he's playing grand theft auto. i tried to get him to watch dark knight with me later but he wants to watch borat. i'm just gonna sit next to him and zine on the sofa. i'd be too restless otherwise.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
originally uploaded by frl.zucker.
It’s that time again grrrls! I am looking for submissions for the third issue of “I Knew a Motherfucker Like You and She Said…” It’s a compilation zine of writing by grrrls, edited by me (Clementine Cannibal). The theme of the zine is uncensored honesty on topics that we feel we are expected to be silent about. I want the real shit. There are so many things that grrrls are not allowed to say or ask or express. We aren’t allowed to talk about our bodies, histories, sexualities, even our opinions without scorn, violence or humiliation. Grrrls get told to shut up. We get told that we’re stupid, that we aren’t good enough. We are told that we are gross and ugly and should feel ashamed. This is a zine where we refute that, where we express what it’s like to live with that shit put on us, where we make room for each other and listen to each other. It’s not about judging each other, it’s not about being perfect, it’s not about being right, it’s not about silencing each other. It’s about listening to each other, and finding the courage to speak, to say the things you really need to say. We are listening. You can be as bitchy and fucked up as you want. You don’t have to spell shit right. You can rant and rave or write a story. You can bitch about bad lovers. You can tell your deepest secrets. You can tell the truth, how you feel, who you are. You can use a fake name if you want, or pimp your shit off in the zine. You can say shit in this zine that you might feel uncomfortable or scared saying in other places, because we got your back, and we are putting ourselves out there too. This is a girlVIRUS production and it is dedicated to the empowerment of all grrrls.
topics might include: rocknroll, punkrock, music in general, sex, pleasure, relationships, violence, sexual violence, drug or alcohol use or abuse, masturbation, ambition, partying, anger, feelings about your body, ways to "riot" or fight back, feelings of grrrl solidarity or feelings of alienation, experiences of humiliation or being "made an example of", things that really matter to you, things that piss you off, experiences with your period, learning about sex: the things you wish you'd known back then, experiences with stds, birth control, reproductive choice, abortion: medical and/or "natural", experiences with work, dealing with grrrl jobs such as retail, service jobs, sex work of various kinds, or trying to "make it" in male dominated jobs or neither or both, mental "health" or "unhealth", or "gofuckyourself i AM healthy", experience with psychwards and that whole psych world, being called or considered crazy/hysterical/emotional/fucked up, living in a world that promotes girlhate, sexual harassment, pedophelia, experiences with body hair removal (shaving, waxing, whatever) or not removing body hair, times when people threatened you or fucked with you and how you felt and so on.
Send submissions or questions to email@example.com
for more info:
order issue 1 or 2 here:
please pass this on to your grrrlfriends!
- - - - - -
CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS, FIST FIGHT ZINE
fist fight is a zine about girls and every day fights, from physical confrontations at shows, to the fight for autonomy with medical professionals, or the fight against advertising to be body posi. it’s about girl gangs, and strong/weird female friendships.
It’s about feeling positive and strong. It’s about being inspired by other women on days when we’ve been feeling overwhelmed or defeated.
we want your contributions! we’re interested in your personal writing/essays/comics/art.
when you’re submitting, think about: whether it fits the theme and feel of fist fight (if you think it does, you’re probably right), whether you want to lay it out on the page or if you’re happy for us to do that, and a title.
you should also send a short (like 50 words or less) blurby bio-y type thing. totally mention your own projects so people can find you.
if you want more info, or want to check if what you you’re making fits the theme you can contact me here, or email firstname.lastname@example.org
DEADLINE FOR SUBMISSIONS IS 10TH MAY, 2010!
- - - - - -
Urgent abortion support appeal: help a teenage girl in Northern Ireland.
Whether it’s a shortage of mange tout at the supermarket or a friend stranded abroad, we’ve all been affected by the cloud of ash from Iceland. But imagine if you had only a few weeks to navigate your way to England for a safe and legal abortion.
This week, we’ve heard from a number of women who were due to have travel to the UK this week for terminations, including a very young teen who is extremely close to the 24 week time limit for abortions in the UK. She had to miss her appointment earlier this week and is now coming next week by ferry and train – a roundtrip journey of more than 24 hours. Her mother solely supports her and her siblings with a part time job and now has to cover costs of £2,300 (procedure + money lost on cancelled flights + last minute ferry and train tickets).
Due to these extraordinary and extremely difficult circumstances, ASN has made a pledge to fund this young woman £500, much more than we usually commit to a single case. This is less than half of the costs she is facing. We would like to help more. If you would like to help cover more costs for her and women like her, please pledge to make a donation today.
You can do this by donating via PayPal (http://www.abortionsupport.org.uk/donate/), writing a cheque (email email@example.com for our postal address), or by making an online transfer (HSBC/Abortion Support Network/Sort Code: 40-11-18/Account Number: 64409302).
Please mark the donation “Iceland”.
Thank you in advance for any amount you can give – your donation will make a real difference to this family or to one of the other women who have had to re-purchase tickets to travel to England.
- - - -
i felt somewhat weird about reblogging about abortion support fun on tumblr five minutes after gushing about ola salo becoming a dad. like that time i giggled about finally 'yawn raping' carl, and then reblogging serious stuff about real rape. i'm a strange little girl, living in a strange little world.
in other news; i just pre-ordered my copy of in full regalia (squee face!!!) tomorrow is a boss free day at work yayeyeyeyeey, i failed to take in my signed electroral registration form to the council in time, which means i can't vote in may (poo. i actually really wanted to! go the usual tukru fail.) i'm trying to decide what dj name to use (i like kissakerho, what do you think) and i'm more than half way done with your pretty face is going straight to hell #10. actually, i know exactly what's going in it, i just need to finish writing all of it, and make it pretty on paper. i manage to scribble about 700 words about something on postit notes at work yesterday while pretending to you know, work.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
i watched 'blink' again today because next week episode will have those bloody freaky angels in it again. i think they might be my favourite doctor who villains ever. i just needed reminding of their creepiness.
i've got 21 pages of your pretty face #10 finished. and i'm feeling a bit lost cos i haven't got anything more to cut and paste (i'll have to write it first!) and i kinda just wanna cut & paste while listening to my new stories (doctor who audio books) writing's not really an option i'm not that multifunctional. i can't write and listen to that at the same time.. sigh. harry potter, sure. cos i know what happens, from listening to them five billion times.
oh yeah, i added two new zines to vampire sushi. about bloody time, i got both in stock last weekend!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
incase anyone wants to listen to that playlist again and stuff, you can download it here: part 1, part 2, part 3. that's all i really wanted to say today, & attached it to a pretty picture i didn't take.
i'm gonna go watch heston's fairytale feast now and then work on #10. cos i really should, i've done fuck all about it for over a week. it's getting along though! i'm excited about being in double digits.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
GIRL GERMS was ace last night. i really enjoyed djing. and it seemed to go down well too. got a few "this song is AWESOME" fistpumps and thumbs ups. glad to oblige! it was probably the best fun i've had in a really long time and hell yeah, i would love to do it again. i only made 3 mistakes i think, played the first song again by accident (oops, track number cock up) and then sort of missed the end of a song and didn't actually the song i was gonna, but the next one. oh well.
here's what i played, by the way.
"JUST DANCING IN THE STREET" LADY GAGA VS MARTHA & THE VANDELLAS
"DANCE WITH ME" THE SOUNDS
"GROOVE IS IN THE HEART" DEEE-LITE
"THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN THIS" BJÖRK
"OFF THE WAGON" L7
"KIDS IN AMERICA" THE MUFFS
"SMELLS LIKE POKER FACE" NIRVANA VS LADY GAGA
"SWEET 69" BABES IN TOYLAND
"JENNIFERS BODY" HOLE
"BIG GIRLS DON'T CRY" EDITH MASSEY
"BIOLOGY" GIRLS ALOUD
"SUPERMODEL" JILL SOBULE
"SUPERMODEL-SUPERFICIAL" VOODOO QUEENS
"FAKE FLESH" KITTEN FOREVER
"HERJAZZ" HUGGY BEAR
"MACHISMO" SAND WITCHES
"LISTEN UP" BIS
"NEW RADIO" BIKINI KILL
"NO YOU DON'T" BRATMOBILE
"NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS" SALT-N-PEPA
"CAR SONG" ELASTICA
"TELEPHONE (FEATURING BEYONCE)" LADY GAGA
"STANDING IN THE WAY OF CONTROL" GOSSIP
"SPIDERWEBS" NO DOUBT
"WHITE MICE" THE MO-DETTES
"TROPHY GIRLFRIEND" HEAVENLY
"GET UP" SLEATER-KINNEY
"LOVE ME OR HATE ME" LADY SOVEREIGN FEATURING MISSY ELLIOTT
"WORK IT OUT" BRASSY
"FLY ON THE WALL" MILEY CYRUS
and cos i'm in a sharing mood, and i thought someone might want to heard it, i uploaded the whole lot on 8tracks*. aren't i lovely?
Friday, April 09, 2010
Girls Germs is a grrrl-tastic night of music, zines, cakes and dancing. We’ll be playing le tigre, Bratmobile, Sleater-Kinney, The Slits, Gossip, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Bikini Kill, M.I.A. and plenty of other amazing tunes by amazing grrrls. It’s a celebration of women’s creativity, proof that girls making music is more than just a faddy trend.
This time, Girl Germs has gone back to everyone's favourite decade, the 90's! Let's pretend riot grrrl is just revving up, and Courtney Love is throwing make-up at Madonna. Dust off your babydoll dress and get ready to dance like it's 1994!
There'll be free cakes, zines from the brilliant Vampire Sushi distro and 90's grrrl classics on the stereo.
There'll be the usual girl germs dj's Lydia & Laura as well as the lovely Tukru, and hopefully some other awesome girls.
Saturday, 10 April 2010 at 21:00
Upstairs CAMDEN HEAD, 100 Camden High Street, London NW1 0LU, United Kingdom
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
i'd write more but i'm too busy going FEEECK PLAYLIST??? i haven't got a clue what's happening so i'm bricking it a bit. i bought some colour shampoo from 99p shop, my hair is desperately dull and depressing at the moment. it's that awful length when it's both too short and too long. meh. but i A) can't afford to go to the hairdresser's and B) don't know what to do with it anyway. i did rather the red stripes i got from the hair modeling thing last june. i haven't done anything to my hair since. except cut my fringe. and perhaps ellie cut it a bit shorter at some point, can't remember. i need to do something about it. i don't think i have the patience to grow it long. it's already in the way. keeps going in my mouth when i'm trying to eat yoghurt, and i end up with weird white bits in my hair.
what the fuck, why am i talking about my hair? i'm supposed to be working on my playlist!
"girlscout" jack off jill.
Wednesday, April 07, 2010
in other news, carl also brought me a really nice feeling grey cardigan i'm lovingly wearing right now. work was ok. selling shit on play now too. *rolls eyes* and i got good post. i've received two trades this week so far and both of them, i've been a bad girl and not done my end of the trade yet. boo boo boo. gonna do my best to do something about them saturday at the latest. sorry emilja & amanda, i suxxors. this is why i should sort out trades the minute i suggest them. wrap 'em up right away, put them in the 'to send' pile.. fail. also, i made notes about saturday night's playlist and i think i may be a little genius, even if i say so myself.
Tuesday, April 06, 2010
i must confess i don't really keep a diary. i have a notebook i carry pretty much everywhere with me (except i don't know where the fuck it is right now and that is making me kinda anxious. my precious kitty book!! i'm holding it in the picture above, along side a library book of photographs of paranormal activity.) but i don't write a journal. i tried a few years ago and well.. my mind is too fragmented for real journals. so i just keep a zine notebook, really. most things i write end up either in zines, on this blog or on my tumblr. i should probably try to keep a diary again.. get yet another fucking notebook. they've got some quite good ones at wilkos. and journal sets at work. kids' ones with locks and all. i've been somewhat tempted by the tinkerbell set...
Tell us what your novel is about and when it will be finished.
i jokingly call it my ya queer novel (which is what it is) & i prefer not to talk about the plot cos, omg spoilers. but it's pretty much about friendship, grrrrls, confusion and stuff. by this rate, it will never ever be finished. i've been 'writing' it since november 2005 and i'm at chapter 9 so far and just under 13,000 words. and nowhere near finished.
You mentioned on your blog about doing a queer girl issue of your zine so do you have girl crushes or class yourself as bisexual?
i have plenty of girl crushes. more crushes on girls than boys, really. i don't class myself as bisexual because that suggests i believe that there is a gender binary as in two separate sexes or whatever and i like them both. i don't really like people according to what they've got in their pants but in their hearts and minds, you know, personalities i guess. the person i'm currently with and in love with just happens to be a boy. but yeah, i prefer to use the word queer, that leaves more 'choice' for me. and no, i'm not 'just greedy'.
Monday, April 05, 2010
i said to emma "it's like heaven!" and then realized at least half the records around us were most likely pretty rubbish. so she suggested it's the purgatory.
we also went through some other stuff in the backroom. i found a couple of kitschy prints carl's gonna buy for me next time he goes in. and there was also a big box of these strange books from the fifties about foreign countries & they came with colour pictures on stamp paper that you could stick in. me and carl once found some in a skip. i found some excellent ones in there, including ALL OF THE NORDIC COUNTRIES. yes, including finland! + some other gems. my want pile ended up being 12 of them. oh dear. none of this stuff was priced, hopefully it won't come up to loads.. i think i'm going to go see carl again next sunday (he's usually in on sundays but obvs it wasn't open yesterday) on my way back from london town, and then we can walk home together <3.
oh i experience it all the bloody time. i'm still trying to figure out how to overcome it, it seems to be getting worse as time gets on, or maybe it's just the english winter that gets me down. not sure. i try to keep myself too busy to think about it. write, knit while watching enders, get stuck on tumblr putting pictures back on the internet. i'm afraid i have no answers.
i still live in eldon street. you're welcome to write me a letter, i love surprise post! though i am pretty rubbish at responding to surprise letters from so called strangers because i have no idea what to write back other than "thank you for your kind words" which is more of a postcard than a letter, isn't it? than again, i do have a pile of kitty postcards & matching envelopes that carl brought me from oxfam. i could finally put them to use!
Do you have a bath tub? (This is kinda important!) What would you suggest one does when nice ideas just get stuck in the brain raw and blurry and won't come out (in the form of anything productive)? What's your favourite (non-Harry-Potter) book?
yes, i have a bath tub. unfortunately that's all we have, no shower. not even a shower head because the tabs on our bath are too big. and the water pressure's all fucked up anyway so it would either be freezing or boiling water coming through. we currently wash our hair every couple of days in the sink & over the bath. class.
i would actually like an answer to this problem too! i've got so many ideas inside my head and they just refuse to come out in any coherent way at all. i just end of writing vague to do lists. other things i do: try to force myself, just scribble away, make a note of the ideas. it doesn't matter if it's incoherent and not good enough, at least that way you'll have made note of the idea and you can get back to it when you feel more able and it doesn't just dissappear somewhere where all the things you forget go. unfortunately i usually get ideas while i'm at work or walking somewhere and unable to make these notes. which really suxx.
favourite non-harry potter books.. 'tales from the moomin valley' by tove jansson. (and all the other moomin books) i also like the chrestomanci series by diana wynne jones, particularly 'conrad's fate', 'charmed life' and 'the lives of christopher chant'. also, i've read 'the perks of being a wallflower' by stephen chomsky several times, and will never get sick of it.
Is white kendal mint cake preferable to brown?
i'm afraid i have never had either kind of kendal mint cake, thus i have no opinion whatsoever.
Why are you so damn awesome?
maybe it's something in the grape soda. beats me.
+ two from tumbrl:
Have you ever thought about marriage? What are your thoughts on it for you and your partner?
woah, that is a big one.
i don’t really know. in the end of the day (god i hate that phrase) it is only a piece of paper & bureaucracy, but a lot of people do take it seriously and getting married gives an extra ‘meaning’ or depth to their relationship in their minds, which is fair enough. each to their own, right? especially if you are ‘right for each other’ and all that. i believe everyone should be able to get married if they want to, i don’t see what right the goverment or the church or whatever has to deny people their right to take their vows if they want to. gay marriage wouldn’t take anything away from the ‘sanctity’ of marriage. love is love whatever form it takes. and people should be able to do whatever they like as long as it doesn’t hurt others.
personally, i would kinda love to marry carl, though i think it might be mainly so we could have a big party to celebrate our relationship, ha. how lame am i? watching some of my best friends get married and have super awesome wedding parties hasn’t helped. i have actually thought about this and pondered whether it should take place here or back home. what i will wear. the first dance.. and well. i’m not going to get into this now. i might write about it in a zine some time. we could have a big party anyway, without the whole getting married thing, next time it’s our anniversary or something. though we did just have a milestone one in november, five years. but every time i joke about marriage, he sort of freaks out and to be honest, i’m not 100% sure we’re solid enough for such a commitment anyway. cos you know, divorce is a lot of hassle if it doesn’t work out..
woah, my views on marriage aren’t exactly radical, are they?
(after i'd written this answer i realised the question was "have you ever thought about marriage" instead of "what are your thoughts on marriage". oops. need to learn to read proper.)
oh crap, that’s another big one! feminism & riot grrrl are superimportant to me, as one may be able to tell from some of my reblogs. riot grrrl is how i discovered feminism a bit over ten years ago (yes, i am old) i used to even ‘run’ the finnish riot grrl chapter. well, i did a website and another friend of mine organized one meeting and some gigs in helsinki, and we were both interviewed for a feminist zine back in the day. it’s rather embarrassing but hilarious that interview. unfortunately i can’t find the damn zine anywhere.
i’ve been meaning to write about my views on the whole ‘riot grrrl revival’ thing that’s going on, but don’t always feel like i can articulate my politics & views well enough to make sense. and that i’ll be scoffed at by the cleverer people than me and leave me feeling dumb. so i haven’t. but i don’t write about feminism and riot grrl very often exactly because of that. but i’m working on the self doubt. and hopefully manage something in #10. xxx
Friday, April 02, 2010
cardigan; primark, on sale.
long sleeved tee; primark, ages ago.
pleated skirt; oxfam present from carl
tights; primark, on sale
boots; new look, on sale.
knitted mohair bow(tie); by me.
knitted piece of pie; by me. soon to be a fascinator when i stop slacking off.
on another note; i just randomly logged into my formspring and found questions in there from my ask anything post from a couple of weeks ago. i thought no one had asked me anything cos i'm sure i'd got email notifications of my previous 2 formspring messages. ASK SOME MORE, and i'll log in again and actually answer some, very soon. as soon as i have enough questions..